"He said he fell in love with another woman. Can love be like this? Can a man truly love two women at the same time?" a woman tearfully confided to a psychologist. Her husband had told her he loved another woman, yet still loved her.
Motivation for Starting a Second Relationship
In truth, when pursuing another affair, he often expects his wife to maintain the household and raise the children. When his new relationship faces difficulties, or before he fully controls the other woman, he pleads with his wife not to divorce him. Ultimately, he wants her to believe it's not his fault.
Many married men require two or more women to feel secure.
More married men struggle to manage both their troubled marriages and new relationships—unable to love both women, they find it difficult to leave one while marrying the other.
Men who claim to love two women are unlikely to love either—or any woman at all.Clearly, they sexually attract many women who desire his attention and commitment—he confuses his sexual desire or need with "love." Yet he doesn't truly love any woman.
These men's emotional issues defy any chemical reaction model. They won't actively resolve the triangle and lack the energy or willingness to nurture two loving relationships.They possess immature narcissism and fear genuine romantic involvement with women. They would rather have a messy bed than the orderly tension of building an equal, intimate relationship with an honest partner, even if it means no woman cherishes them. A Deep Understanding of Marriage and Women For many men, their greatest fear is typically being trapped in a happy marriage.On one hand, they dread sharing life with a woman who sees through them; on the other, they refuse to relinquish a woman who views them as heroes or treasures. When life's realities overwhelm them, they invariably seek escape, reverting to the carefree freedom of adolescence. Yet they may lack the strength or courage to truly run away.They often fantasize about romantic dreams, clinging like children to their mothers, always craving comfort and security.
Staying by his side might help him before he awakens, but if he believes he can love or is loving two women, it's meaningless wishful thinking. Before he truly understands the nature of his problem, he has already hurt the women who enter his life.
Men don't choose difficulty.
Caught between two women, he cannot and will not choose one over the other, for both attract him and terrify him. With two women, he feels secure and fulfilled; with just one, his profound lack of confidence leaves him intensely anxious. What he truly needs is psychological counseling, not another woman.
Men and women must understand that when one man loves two women, using the word "love" carries inherent potential for misdirection. Remember, love isn't merely a vague emotion—it involves mutual giving and deep attachment. As for the notion that "love is selfless devotion," that's mostly just a grand empty phrase.