"Parents of migrant workers' children often provide material support but neglect their children's emotional well-being," Zhou Xiaoxi noted. Due to long working hours and high-intensity labor, most migrant workers return home exhausted, rarely able to attend to their children—let alone communicate with them—which easily leads to negative emotions in children.
"If you could receive one form of help, what would you hope for?" Zhou Xiaoxi walked among the students and posed this question.
"A hug from my mom!" declared a girl with cheeks flushed red.
"I wish my parents wouldn't fight anymore. I want our family to live happily together!" said the tall, slender girl Xiaoying, tears welling up as she spoke.
In mid-May,the "Hongyun Library · Caring for Migrant Workers' Children Volunteer Service Initiative" arrived in Xinjiang. At the Kuytun River Basin Management Office Middle School of the Seventh Division of the Xinjiang Production and Construction Corps—where over 70% of students are children of migrant workers—and at Urumqi No. 79 Middle School, Associate Professor Zhou Xiaoxi of the Xinjiang Youth League School and Xinjiang child protection expert led "Heart-to-Heart Conversations" with over 400 children of migrant workers.
Parents preoccupied with making ends meet often find communication with their children a one-way street.
Thirteen-year-old Kong Lei transferred to Kuitun River Basin Management Office Middle School for fifth grade. At school, he was a "sunshine boy"—actively participating in class activities and occasionally opening up to teachers.Yet at home, he transformed into a different person: constantly demanding money from his parents, throwing tantrums when refused, and ultimately ending up in juvenile court for robbery.
"Kong Lei grew up with his grandparents in his hometown. Reuniting with his parents in the city was his deepest wish. But at some point, a cold wall rose between him and his parents,"Class teacher Xu Leilei explains: "The severe mismatch between school education and family upbringing is the biggest issue facing migrant children today. Many parents don't know how to express their feelings or say 'I love you' to their children, leaving many kids feeling deprived of parental warmth."
This dynamic was evident in Zhou Xiaoxi's conversations with the children and their impromptu performances.
One scene depicted a child returning home after failing an exam."Why did you fail again?" "Dad" stormed over angrily, shouting, "Do you know why we left our hometown to work so hard in the city? For whom?" "Mom" tried to stop him, saying, "Stop hitting the child."
"Mom and Dad" began arguing fiercely over the child's grades.
The "child," timid and resentful, cried out, "Stop fighting!"
The children's vividly portrayed expressions revealed how many families often spend their days amid quarrels and discontent.
"Migrant workers generally pin their hopes for changing their fate on the next generation, placing great importance on their children's education and doing everything possible to ensure their children not only 'have access to education' but also 'receive a good education,'" said Zhou Xiaoxi. Parents work dawn to dusk every day to create better learning conditions for their children, but they often neglect communication with them, leading to a lack of understanding and trust between parents and children.When problems arise, parents resort to harsh, simplistic methods to "educate" their children. Additionally, migrant children frequently move between cities, experiencing constant displacement and migration. This lack of security and belonging during their formative years makes it difficult for them to build confidence and resist constraints. Especially during adolescence, they often become rebellious, escalating conflicts between parents and children.
At the event, most migrant children expressed that certain topics remain off-limits with their parents, who they perceive as overly strict, uncomprehending, and distrustful.
Wang Shenglin, principal of Urumqi No. 79 Middle School, has also observed this issue. He noted: "Parents of migrant workers are preoccupied with making ends meet, leaving little time to care for or engage with their children. Alternatively, their approaches may be misguided, resulting in a 'communication gap' between parents and children."
Children Should Also Learn to Praise Their Parents
During the dialogue session, a boy named Xiaohu was asked to sing a song in front of everyone.
Without hesitation, the melody of Xu Wei's "Blue Lotus" flowed from his lips: "Nothing can stop my longing for freedom..."
"This song speaks for me!" Xiao Hu shared. He explained that coming home late often drew criticism from his parents, leaving him little time to play and deepening his inner yearning for freedom.
Like Xiao Hu, many children crave their parents' understanding. Yet when they try to share worries or thoughts, parents are often absent or dismiss them due to work demands.Zhou Xiaoxi explained that most migrant workers face long hours and intense labor, returning home exhausted and rarely able to attend to their children, let alone communicate with them. This easily leads to negative emotions in children. With weak self-control or no one to confide in, children may develop various issues. Faced with such situations, parents often say: "Who are we working so hard for?Isn't it so you can afford college someday? Why are you so disappointing?" Yet children often fail to absorb these words. "But as children, we should also try to share our inner thoughts with our parents and strive to understand and appreciate them," Zhou Xiaoxi believes. Children shouldn't constantly complain that their parents don't understand them; instead, they should try opening their hearts to communicate.Don't resent parents for talking too much; both children and parents share the responsibility of creating a positive family atmosphere.
For example, when witnessing parents arguing but unsure how to intervene, some children resort to slamming doors or making noise to get attention—actions that make parents feel their child is immature. Instead, the child should say: "Mom and Dad, I get really scared when you argue. I wish our family could be happy together."
"Parents work incredibly hard every day, so it's understandable when they're in a bad mood sometimes. Children should understand and be considerate of their parents, taking the initiative to talk with them," Zhou Xiaoxi said. There are many ways children can support their parents, such as complimenting them with "This dish is delicious!" or saying "You must be tired" when they come home from work, or asking "What can I do to help?" when parents need assistance.
"Love needs to be spoken aloud!" Zhou Xiaoxi emphasized.