Xixi is almost three years old. At home, he's pampered like a little emperor—whatever he wants, he gets. If he doesn't get his way immediately, he starts screaming at the top of his lungs. He also uses loud outbursts to express strong resistance to things he dislikes or refuses to do, which is a real headache for Mom and Dad:First, they worry that constantly shouting at the top of his lungs might damage his voice. Moreover, this tendency to scream at the slightest provocation seems detrimental to fostering a well-rounded personality.So how should parents address this habit of loud outbursts?
Why Does My Baby Act Like a Little Loudspeaker? (Public Health Network)
A baby's psychology isn't as simple as adults might assume. They possess rich and nuanced emotions, which become more complex as they encounter new experiences. However, their immaturity prevents them from rationally analyzing situations before acting—they often follow their impulses instead. So when you hear your baby shouting,parents should first understand the underlying reasons behind the outburst to implement targeted responses. This not only reduces long-term vocal cord damage from prolonged screaming but also allows for early intervention during the critical period of psychological development. Addressing negative behaviors and emotional issues promptly supports the full development of a child's intelligence, emotions, feelings, and willpower, thereby safeguarding and enhancing their mental health and fostering a well-rounded personality.
So, under what circumstances might babies resort to crying?
1. Feeling neglected: Babies crave adult attention intensely. This isn't just a physiological or safety need—it's an essential psychological and emotional requirement. When they sense parental neglect, their insecurity may trigger aggressive behavior or loud outbursts to express dissatisfaction and reclaim attention.Some parents, especially after having a second child, notice their older child suddenly becoming prone to loud outbursts, defiance, or bullying younger siblings. Often, they're simply sending a signal to Mom and Dad: "You're ignoring me!"
2.The child is under pressure: If a child faces criticism from a teacher at kindergarten or struggles to get along with other children, they may experience stress. However, due to their young age and lack of coping skills, they cannot resolve this internal pressure on their own. When accumulated stress becomes overwhelming or persists for too long, the child may become irritable and resort to shouting or other vocal outbursts to express their emotions. This is essentially the child's way of releasing pent-up feelings.
3. The child seeks to achieve their own goals, wants parents to act according to their wishes, or desires freedom from parental restrictions. For example, when a child wants something and parents cannot immediately fulfill their request, they may cry loudly in an attempt to persuade parents to compromise.Other children, when deeply engaged in an activity, may become furious if interrupted by their parents, venting their anger through loud outbursts or tantrums.
Strategies for Coping:
1. Strengthen parent-child communication: Parents should set aside time daily to connect with their child—whether through casual chats, storytelling, or simple games. Accurately understanding their emotions allows for timely comfort.Parents planning a second child or those who already have one should pay special attention to soothing the older child's emotions. Avoid neglecting the older sibling while caring for the younger one. Involve the older child in caring for the baby or toddler, allowing them to feel a sense of responsibility as a big brother or sister while helping parents with the younger sibling.
2. Explain simple, easy-to-understand principles:Once children can understand language, parents should consciously cultivate their self-control by explaining simple principles. When a child attempts to achieve unreasonable demands through screaming, parents must promptly intervene with a firm attitude. Use decisive language and expressions to make it clear that parents won't yield to tantrums. This helps children quickly adjust their emotions.Once the child has calmed down, parents should revisit the incident and teach the child to manage their emotions.
3. For tantrums stemming from frustration or setbacks, parents can guide children to appropriately release these negative emotions. This might involve letting them express their feelings of injustice or redirecting their attention through toys or games. Teach children to vent their stress in healthy ways.
4. Learn to acknowledge and reflect your child's feelings rather than dismissing them with phrases like "It's okay" or "Don't be afraid." Such responses invalidate their emotions. Instead, say something like, "I know you're upset because we neglected you," which validates their feelings. When children feel understood and accepted by their parents, their emotions naturally ease.