Before having children, I'd hear people say: "Having kids boosts a woman's immunity—one child adds ten years to your life!" Back then, I thought childbirth sounded like a great deal—it even promised longevity! If circumstances allowed, having more kids would be wonderful—I'd surely become a centenarian... But after actually giving birth, I realized it's nothing like that. That "ten extra years" nonsense? Total bullshit!After giving birth, a woman's suffering is beyond description...
Shocking: The Five Major Hardships Women Face After Childbirth (Public Health Network)
1. Becoming Prone to Illness After Childbirth I've been hooked up to IV drips for days now. Sitting there helplessly watching the drip bottle, I chatted with the female doctor: "Why do I keep needing IV fluids?I used to fight off colds without even taking medicine. Now it's IV drips and injections, and it's been like this for half a month! Is it because I'm getting old?" The doctor looked furious: "You're not even in your 80s! What do you mean 'getting old' when you're talking to someone born in the 70s?"
Turns out, it's not about age.The female doctor had given birth to two children. She said that especially after having her second child, her health deteriorated noticeably. She kept getting sick easily, and once she did, it dragged on for ages. It felt like her body was no longer under her control. She said someone like me was doing quite well—I wasn't too old when I had my child, and I only had one, so my situation was much better than hers. Especially those who have children at an advanced age often end up with a host of health issues.
Seriously! Having a baby gives you ten extra years? Who says that? That's just plain misleading!
2. Becoming More Sensitive to Cold After Childbirth In winter, I bundle myself up like a dumpling, yet walking down the street, the cold wind still makes me shiver uncontrollably.
I'd watch the stylish girls walking by in minimal layers with envy, muttering to myself, "Hmph! Just wait till you catch a cold from freezing!" Then I'd wistfully recall: Once upon a time, I wasn't afraid of the cold either (I really could handle the chill back then)!
I remember one Valentine's Day (before having kids, of course), my bestie and I dressed "beautifully cold," strolling through snow-dusted streets. We listened to "Valentine's Day Without a Valentine" playing from nearby shops, each holding a huge, steaming hot ice cream cone...Now, whenever I recall that scene, I can't help but shiver: It was so cold! I really admire my younger self: In winter, I barely needed thermal leggings, sweaters didn't have to be too thick, and even my padded coat had to be super thin—otherwise, I'd feel too hot...
Sigh! You tell me—it's just having a baby, but why does it make such a huge difference before and after?
3. Becoming More Forgetful After Childbirth Though I hate to admit it, it's true.
For a while there, I felt like I had dementia—my memory was shot. When searching for something, I'd have a vague memory of where it might be, but that memory would vanish in an instant. No matter how hard I tried to recall, nothing came back.This happened with finding things and with remembering events. When this forgetfulness became a frequent occurrence in my daily life, I started to wonder: When did this start? Is something wrong with my brain?
Thinking back, it was after having the baby! You see, before having children, my memory was actually pretty good.But after having a child, after that long, chaotic period of adjusting to caring for a baby, this is what happened. Whenever I need to find something, I instinctively panic: "Where is it? Where is it?" And then I genuinely can't remember where it is... Once, twice, three times, after so many times, I can only helplessly admit: "My brain isn't working right anymore. I've gotten dumb!"It wasn't until after having kids that I heard another saying: "Having a child makes you dumb for three years!" If I'd heard that earlier, maybe...
4. Becoming More Timid After Having Kids I wasn't exactly brave before, but I was definitely braver than I am now. Really.
When crossing the street with my son, I always grip his hand tightly, constantly urging, "Hurry up, hurry up! Cars are coming this way, move it!" I'd practically carry him across if I could, terrified he might get grazed or bumped. Sometimes when riding bikes with him, I keep glancing back and warning him, "Don't move around! Keep your feet up! Stop fidgeting—you're trying to scare me to death!" When I see news reports about child abductions on TV, I can't help but sigh deeply, filled with hatred for the traffickers. Then at night, I have nightmares about my son disappearing. In those dreams, I'm terrified, and when I wake up, I cry until my pillow is soaked through...
Sigh!Ever since having a child, I've become increasingly timid, constantly afraid of this and that. I feel like I'm losing myself more and more!
V. Getting Closer to Becoming a Haggard Housewife Before marriage, I looked down on women labeled as "haggard housewives."
Just look at her: she dares to run out onto the street in her pajamas!And this: her figure completely distorted, dressed in shabby clothes, walking like she's chasing a thief—where's the slightest trace of feminine grace?And those haggling over pennies at the market, scrambling for bargains in supermarket lines... Back then, I thought: What's the point of being a woman if you sink to that level? So I warned myself again and again: Never become that kind of woman! I refuse to be a frumpy housewife!
But you have to experience things firsthand to truly understand them.After having children, I finally understood: that woman who dared to dash out in her pajamas was rushing to deliver a forgotten backpack to her absent-minded child; that woman whose figure had changed, dressed shabbily and walking with no grace whatsoever, as if chasing a thief—she was probably afraid she wouldn't make it in time to pick up her child from school;And those women haggling over pennies, queuing to buy essentials—they live frugal lives. Though they may seem vulgar, it's precisely through this vulgarity and lack of grace that they earn their families' happy smiles.
In short, to sum it up.
After giving birth, every part of a woman's body is not what it used to be! Want a child? The cost is enormous! After childbirth, the changes are starkly evident! Hearing this, are those planning to have a baby or expecting soon feeling a bit daunted? Actually, there's no need for fear, nor should you agonize over questions like "Is having a child just not worth it?"
Because all the changes, all the hardships, all the sacrifices—they all fade into insignificance the moment your baby beams a wide, drooling smile, arms outstretched, calling out "Mama" to you...