When encountering "unruly children," many attribute it to "unruly parents." Undeniably, family education plays a pivotal role in a child's development, with parents' words and actions constantly shaping their offspring. A child's sense of right and wrong often stems from parental influence, and many undesirable traits are cultivated through parental misguidance and indulgence.
For instance, many children easily develop jealousy—envious of others' new clothes or toys, resentful of those more accomplished. Others lack respect for others, shouting in public places or vandalizing property. These behaviors stem from subtle parental influences. Without proper guidance, such upbringing hinders a child's healthy development.But for new parents, many are first-time caregivers. So how can one become a competent parent? How can children be raised well?
First, parents must learn to dedicate time and calmly educate their children. When children chatter incessantly, asking endless questions, many parents feel irritated and think their children are wasting time.This is incorrect. For children, the world is full of unfamiliar things. They can only find answers by asking their parents. Children are naturally curious, and some questions may seem nonsensical. It is the parents' role to guide them well, which can enhance their exploration of the world and their interest in learning.
Next, parents must be willing to let go and cultivate their child's independence. As children grow, parents need to understand that they are independent individuals, not toys to be controlled. Parents shouldn't handle everything for their children; some matters require children to learn to face on their own. This helps nurture their sense of independence from an early age and gradually teaches them to think for themselves, which is crucial for their development.
Furthermore, parents should not fear embarrassment and must be willing to admit their mistakes. Parents are not infallible; they make errors too. Many parents, seeking to maintain parental authority, refuse to acknowledge their faults in front of their children. This can lead children to lose their ability to judge right from wrong. In reality, parents who courageously admit their mistakes teach children that errors must be corrected and not repeated. Moreover, parents who know how to apologize foster more harmonious relationships with their children.
Finally, parents must respect their children and offer praise. Avoid "punitive education." Professor Jia Fujun from Guangdong Provincial People's Hospital and Guangdong Mental Health Center emphasized in an interview that parenting should involve objective evaluation, appropriate praise, and constructive criticism.Respect your child, especially in front of others. Avoid using your child's strengths to belittle others, nor should you use others' strengths to criticize your child. In other words, refrain from comparing your child to others or frequently saying things like "So-and-so from such-and-such family is so outstanding." To foster a positive parent-child relationship, consciously engage your child in more outdoor activities.