Regarding sexual fantasies during intercourse, some propose this theory: before sexual tension is released, men's facial muscles tense up—even spasm—resulting in unpleasant expressions. Thus women prefer to keep their eyes closed, imagining a handsome, dashing man merging with them instead of their husbands.
Doesn't this seem a bit absurd? Few would readily accept it, and certainly no one would openly admit it to their husband. You may call this theory ridiculous, and whether one dares to admit it is another matter. Yet this doesn't negate the fact that, according to sexologists' research, a significant number of women have engaged in similar fantasies during intercourse, using them to heighten their own arousal.Once men grasp this reality, many feel humiliated, assuming their own inadequacy in appearance or performance fuels these fantasies. Many women, too, feel uneasy or guilty about such fantasies and consciously suppress them. In truth, both perspectives are mistaken.
Sexual fantasies can serve as a form of sexual stimulation—akin to a "psychological aphrodisiac"—and are commonly employed during masturbation or intercourse to achieve orgasm.If dissatisfied with a sexual partner during intercourse (such as in a reluctant marriage), individuals often achieve orgasm through fantasies (imagining sex with a desired lover).
While most sexual fantasies focus on pleasurable sexual activities, a minority involve being raped or sexually abused. From a psychoanalytic perspective, two explanations exist:① The subconscious aggressive instinct combines with sexual fantasy. If directed toward a sexual object, it forms a fantasy of abusing that object; if directed inward, it forms a fantasy of being sexually abused. ② Under the influence of traditional sexual repression, women often feel shame or guilt about sexual behavior. If they imagine themselves actively pursuing sex in their fantasies, it triggers self-blame or anxiety.At this point, through the psychological defense mechanism of "reverse formation," fantasizing about being subjected to "rape" allows one to both enjoy sexual pleasure and find justification for oneself.They can serve as a "psychological aphrodisiac" for arousal and function as a defense mechanism, substituting for unattainable sexual pursuits to achieve partial psychological satisfaction. However, excessive indulgence in sexual daydreams that disrupts normal life, or fantasies so bizarre that they are firmly believed to be real, constitute pathological fantasies or delusions. These may indicate schizophrenia or other mental illnesses and warrant seeking psychiatric help.